Look, I love weird old things, so when a friend handed me The Toilet of Flora—first published in the 1760s by French botany buff Pierre-Joseph Buc'hoz—I was hooked. Let’s be clear: the “toilet” in the title doesn't mean the plumbing kind. Back then, “toilet” referred to getting ready for the day. Powder, potions, face creams—essentially an 18th-century Sephora but with less shimmer and more... essence of wormwood?

The Story

There is no plot with characters—it’s non-fiction. But the story is the wild history embedded in its recipes: how Europeans handled real problems like bad breath, thinning hair, killing lice, even fumigations to ‘correct the air’ in a stuffy house. Buc'hoz divides nature into powers: some herbs heal wounds, some perfume breath, some ward off disease. Warning: many recipes involve stinging nettles, sweat extraction, or “biting” elixirs. Trust me, self-care in the 18th-century was not for the faint of heart—or the sensitive nose.

Why You Should Read It

You think you have a skincare routine? Try infusing dandelion roots in wine for 40 days and then rubbing the sludge over your face. This book seriously made me giggle uncomfortably in public. It’s also a fascinating window into how people thought health worked: beauty as an extension of medicine. If you’re into the weird history of wellness, natural remedies, old beauty hacks, and just boggling at ancient OCD levels, you’ll eat this up. Buc'hoz believes we can fix anything with local plants—rosemary, lavender, sage… and not a single soy matcha scrub in sight.

Final Verdict

The Toilet of Flora is perfect for history nerds, garden weirds, witchy DIY fans, and anyone who can’t stop watching rabbit-hole documentaries on life before iPhones. It’s like having a snarky 1700s botanist grandpa walk you through how to cure anxiety with puffball mushrooms. Not uplifting, but definitely original. Ideal for nightstand reading—preferably before flu season—because after browsing these pages, a modern shelf full of hand sanitizer feels like high poetry.

⚠️ Do not actually try the recipes. I tested *one* foot salve and I’m pretty sure my neighbor’s cat filed a report.